Happify or Wholify?

As a counselor, I think one of the greatest things I can do for my clients is to bust the myth of Happily-ever-after. We grow up hearing this story over and over again and it looks so good at the end of a fairy tale. But we should teach our kids there’s a reason its called a fairy tale. There is no real place called “happily ever after”.   Yet, many of us travel out of childhood and into adulthood on a Holy Grail search for it only to feel constantly frustrated in finding it.

IMG_0623I don’t want my clients to search for it. Instead, I introduce them to wholeness and show them the Life Puzzle model.   I want them to see their lives as an on-going growing journey that honors their physical, emotional, thinking, sexual and spiritual SELF. The framework of the Life Puzzle includes 16 core areas, 5 edges that create the SELF and in putting those pieces together over one’s life journey, wholeness emerges. And happiness? It’s in there too—through the healthy foods we eat, the relationships we engage in, through the family we create, the community we connect with, the environment we care for etc. Happiness is also found is managing the special challenges that come into our lives that force us to grow through tough times.

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Wholeness or Happiness?

March 20th was International Day of Happiness.  And of course, it brought a smile to all our faces.  Who doesn’t want a happier world?

It concerns me though that the word “Happiness” is getting such prominence in our media.  “Happiness” infers a state of being–a place where you live in a positive world where life is all pleasant.  It reflects the oft heard childhood phrase “And they all lived happily-ever-after”. Continue reading